Sunday, August 16, 2009

I am a jaded jerk.

I was being my Irish Princess self sitting at Irish Fest today enjoying some acquired-but-delightful music from the bagpipe and drum corps, when all of a sudden a shy but cute young man approaches with the absolute best pick-up line I’ve ever heard. Shaking my hand, he says, “Hi, I’m David. I just came from Mass in the Amphitheater. Did you?”

Well yes, yes I did, David. He was visibly nervous, but nonetheless proceeded to strike up a conversation with several awkwardly delivered questions. Through his stuttering he found out that a. I’m Irish, b. am a practicing Catholic, and c. am beyond my college years. With a yes to all of his apparent laundry list requirements in his quest for his perfect woman, he bravely muttered, “so, um, y-y-you and me, um, you w-w-want to, um, go out some time?”

Although I’m not sure why, I politely declined. Oh wait, yes I do know why - I am a jaded jerk! I am. I really, really am. He delivered the greatest pick-up line I’ve ever heard. He was tall, cute, and Catholic. While he was certainly no comedian, at least he attempted to me laugh. And although he was super awkward and totally a dork, well, so was every guy I’ve ever dated!

I'll give you one guess at what song came on when I got in my car to leave… Ok I’ll tell you: Desperado. That’s just great.

6 comments:

  1. Hey! don't feel too bad. I used to be the same as this poor chap and still am in some ways... well minus being tall, but it's through trying and failing that you figure out the best way to approach a woman and have that slight edge. I'm still a huge dork, I just mete out the dork in little chunks to make it easier to swallow! So consider it a learning experience for the guy.

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  2. Oh, Annie. I think he sounds kind of precious. What could one little date hurt?

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  3. Annie, I kind of think you are being hard on yourself. It seems like you were not ready to go out with anyone at that moment, and that is ok.

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